Baptism

This year’s readings for the Baptism of the Lord had me in tears which is rather surprising as I am not the teary sort. Perhaps the events of the pandemic or the events in Washington this past week finally rose to my tear ducts. Both have been huge in our world of late. I have noticed, too, that the young ones are re-negotiating the relationship responsibilities they have with those who live in their bubble. This is almost always a painful and self-searching proposition even for those of us who like me have been married to the same guy for close to 50 years.

“You are my beloved son (child). In you I am well-pleased.” I am continually amazed at how I hear this Word of God sinking into my heart. BELOVED…I hear it, too, in relation to baptism, an experience of being overwhelmed. Overwhelmed is a frequent feeling for me these days but I am not in a good sense. As I reflected on the words of the Gospel, I was suddenly overwhelmed with being beloved of God and I experienced once again my baptism.

I love this piece by Macrina Wiederkehr, Frail and Glorious:

The waters of baptism flowed over me and no original sin was seen. Rather, the Eye of God beheld a tiny mass of bones and flesh soul and spirit infinite possibility pure process new, empty, and free, free to choose good or evil light or darkness life or death grace or sin.
It was my original union I was passing through the baptismal waters being filled with power like unto God’s and God wept at the possibility of me. Then somewhere in between my baptism and my daily life my power like unto God’s became scattered I forgot my original union with God.

And as I grew I chose good and evil light and darkness life and death grace and sin.
With my baptism lost I began to live my life fragmented, standing on the edge of my baptismal powers blind to their presence in the depths of my soul. Yet all fragments are finally gathered up and God does in us wonders that others are not able to do.
So, on a day that felt like baptism God gave me a glimpse of my hidden splendor, made me aware of that original union and my powers that had become scattered. Now my life is ever spent in calling home my scattered powers.